Courtship vs. Arranged Marriages

[Coyote]

Originally Posted by Delstar

Females should obtain approval from their legal guardian, father or eldest brother if the father is not alive, this is a religious rule. However in tunisia from what i understand if the girl is over 21 she does not need the approval of her father..

In Tunisia, the permission of parents is not required for adult women (minimum age 20), underage need the permission of parents and/or the court.
In some other arabic countries, however, women always need the permission of her father respectively the (male) head of the family.

[Coyote]

Originally Posted by SageMother

So based on what you are saying, males still determine the access females have to when it comes to dating and marriage. Is this something that comes fromo religion or does it have other purposes?

Yes and yes - it comes from the religion and it had, of course, also other purposes. :-)

[Coyote]

yes, a lot is changing and the speed in which the changes occur are remarkeable. This year in Sousse for example, even Tunisian couples walk arm in arm and kiss in the public (visit eg. the arabic promenade part in the center or the area of Khezama and Kantaoui). I know personally more than Tunisian couple living together unmarried (Khezama, Hammam-Sousse), various European/Tunisian couples in all constellations as well (incuding a lot of gay couples). Even in Gafsa, I did not witness any serious problems when walking hand in hand with my gf.

Of course, quite a few relations are considered to be purely ***ual in nature - we looked early this year for example once for an long-term apartment and found a lot of which were only rented hourly or nightly (no passports asked).
The comments of a lot of obviously low-status males hanging around in the streets go into this direction as well.

The amount of out-of-marriage relations is quite high as well (I was absolutely surprised, how high), but while in former years, it was kept more under the lid, you can nowadays easily and almost at any time see older (usually rich) men with younger women in restaurants and bars. Summoning women to keep you company for a meal (and lets see what comes after) is just a matter of a telephone call (for women who need company it is probably even easier, a smile on the street does the trick often already).

However, we are talking here about the big and tourist-affin towns, like Tunis, Sousse, Hammamet, Monastir, Gafsa, etc. - in the country the life is of course much more private and has a greater public morale (while behind the doors the basic conditions seem to be not much different from what I saw and heard).

As a resumee - the lid is definitely off the bottle and the genie is out in Tunisia, and if not something big happens, it won't get back in again.
On a sidenote, I got reports from friends in Morocco, that this country caught up with Tunisia in the very last years. and is, in some regards, now ahead already. In Morocco you can as well see Moroccan couples sitting and walking together (eg. Tanger, Casablanca, Marrakesh), even kissing in the public, which was an absolute and totally punishable no-go just a few years ago.

Algeria also seems to slowly head in this direction, but is nontheless still years behind, while in Libya, time stands almost still in this regard.

[Kamantha]

Most of my cousins have had arranged marriages, but arranged marriages are different to what they were 20 years ago, nowadays, you are introduced to a suitable partner, go out with them, then decide if you want to marry them.

I don't agree with forced marriages they are wrong.

[feefad]

Agree kam, big difference between arranged and forced marriages. I know alot of people through work who have had arranged marriages and have been along the lines of what you said. All are very happy